Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Drive Straight Turn My Stomach

Those that know me know that I LOATHE Nascar!  I think it’s the stupidest thing that has even existed in the face of mankind; right up there with Geometry, Inflatable Lawn Decorations, and Fruit By The Foot.

A few weeks ago, I was strolling through my local Barnes and Noble, sipping my tasty beverage when I spotted something that nearly caused me to spit my delightful drink all over the place.

A NASCAR ROMANCE NOVEL?  Is there any peace in the world?  There was a whole set of these things.  What in the world could they write to fill multiple books?

CHAPTER ONE:
I spotted Billy Ray Bob Jeff at the race.  His lone tooth was shining in the North Carolina sun.  I was torn with grief because I was out on a date with my cousin Earl.  Billy Ray Bob Jeff shared his dreams of someday becoming a race car driver.  Until then, he was paying his dues as a urinal scrubber at the local Go-Kart track. 

Geesh!  Get a life people!